How To Reduce Hook-Ups In Nigeria
Below are the steps on how to reduce hook-ups in Nigeria.
Sequel to these posts (https://www.nairaland.com/7678352/hookup-culture-nigeria-bad-even/1#122971617; https://www.nairaland.com/7680544/what-caused-hookup-culture/5#123045490) where Nigerians, mostly males, keep complaining about the rise of hookup in Nigeria. I thought it pertinent to outline solutions that will REDUCE, not stop the trend.
The demand for sex by men is rising and consistent. As long as men crave sex and women are the only suppliers, nothing can be done. For hookups to reduce, Nigerian men should reduce their insatiable quest to have sex with random women. It is like having a department where male lecturers don’t do engage in sex for grades, ladies who are open to such will be forced to read their books whether they like it or not. Men create the system and women integrate into it. To buttress this, when women who have been doing hook-up attain 30+ years, there is a declining demand for their services because sexual service is tied to age and how young a woman is. As a result, she is either forced to retire or accept lower fees. This is because her customers – all men – have either stopped patronising her or are offering less cash. The men control the system.
It is a biological fact (https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22552705/#:~:text=Sexual) for men to yearn for sex more than women. Women are literally the only people who can quench this thirst. Some will say it is because of greed, but c’mon! If you own something which is in high demand that is not regulated nor banned by the government, are you saying you won’t charge prices for it? Remember, this demand is consistent and persistent.
But errm, hook-up is the same with yahoo yahoo or drugs trading.
That is not true. Cybercrime, like the name implies, is a crime in almost every part of the world. Some governments legalise sex work and even offer health care services and tax them. But no government has legalised defrauding people online. This is because policymakers realise that sex is a natural phenomenon in which humans and animals indulge. You cannot outlaw people having sex. It is not possible. Even in conservative Dubai (https://www.economist.com/middle-east-and-africa/2023/01/05/women-in-the-middle-east-are-leading-a-revolt-against-prudish-men), women are going behind the corners to import intimacy gadgets. The government by law bans it, but does not arrest those who import it. But try importing guns into the country and see the government’s reaction. Dealing with hard drugs is not a natural concept for humans. It is acquired, so governments ban it or regulate it tightly compared to sex work.
For instance, in Geylang, Singapore, young women mostly from China engage in hookups under regulation from the Singaporean government. But if you transport drugs to Singapore, you get the death penalty, no ifs or buts. Japan has the second biggest porn industry globally, but you will be arrested, denied a lawyer for 21 days and detained or deported if you transport drugs into the country. The UAE restricted Nigerians’ entry, mostly men. The UAE would rather have Nigerian girls doing hookups in Dubai than her men committing cybercrime. There has not been a break-in by the Emirati police to arrest hookers compared to bursting cyber criminals.
In Nigeria, the argument is that prostitution is illegal. But that applies only to Northern Nigeria, where Sharia is practiced (https://sabilaw.org/the-legality-of-prostitution-in-nigeria/). However, the same people who castigate hookups will never relocate to the North to live.
This brings me to the next solution: social engineering. If you want the women in your society to be chaste, it is your responsibility as the men in that society to insist on certain moral standards. It is why young ladies in the North do not openly practise hookup compared to the South. Even in the south, some regions are “morally” stricter than others. It is the men who set the standards. Recently on Facebook, in one of the states in the south, I read that husbands or older men sleep with secondary school girls who just finished WASSCE/SSCE. When you do so while your northern counterpart marries the same girl, you tell that girl in your society that she can charge for sex. Meanwhile, her contemporary in the north knows that for sex to happen, there has to be commitment aka marriage.
P.S. Sex is not free. You pay at a point.
Another is poverty. The poorer a society is, the greater the number of women engaging in hook-ups. Women are demisexual, but when push comes to shove, they resort to sex work. Because there is a demand. Patronising sex workers is cheaper in poor countries compared to rich nations. The common theme here (https://www.nairaland.com/7496716/what-exactly-does-one-enjoy) was that sex is cheap in Nigeria. But ask your paddies whether patronising sex workers in Canada is cheap, and hear/read their responses. The solution is to ensure your society becomes very prosperous. In return, your women will have fewer reasons to engage in hook-ups. Fewer reasons because even in prosperous societies, hook-ups still exists. Because, remember, sex is natural. There is a demand, and demand doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Unfortunately, Nigerian men have not been able to create a prosperous society (https://www.nairaland.com/6643241/nigerian-men-failed-women).
P.S. No prosperous country had women at the forefront of development.